879. CRUMB (1994)

Running Time: 119 minutes

Directed By: Terry Zwigoff

Main Cast: Robert Crumb, Charles Crumb, Aline Kaminsky, Maxon Crumb, Robert Hughes

Click here to view the trailer

"...WHEN I WAS ABOUT FIVE OR SIX, I WAS SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO BUGS BUNNY..."

As I sat down to watch a movie last night, the only thoughts in my head were, "Please God, let this be something good. I NEED something good!". Following the watching and reviewing of "Satantango", "Crumb" was just what the doctor ordered!

For the unaware, "Crumb" is a documentary feature about the life and rise to fame of underground, controversial cartoonist Robert Crumb, better known to his fans as R. Crumb and to the public as the creator of Fritz the Cat. Not only does the film chronicle the life of Robert, but also climbs a little higher on his family tree and shows the lifestyles of his brothers, Charles and Maxon. Charles Crumb, a suicidal, recluse who lives with his mother, confining himself to a book filled room, is constantly doped up on anti-depressants. Robert's other brother, Maxon (or Max) lives at a hotel and also clearly has depression and anxiety issues. We learn that the troubling adulthood of the three boys could have been caused by an overbearing, tyrant of a father who physically punished the boys on a regular basis. In addition to the family lifestyles, we also get a heaping helping of Robert's career, getting to see hundreds of his drawings, many of which he shows off personally and describes the motivation behind them. In the 60s and 70s, Crumb became controversial for his less than flattering portrayal of women and his elevated sexual overtones. Robert also discusses his sexual interests and how those interests have sculpted and sometimes defined his drawings.

Charles Crumb

Man, it's just so hard to write about a documentary. It has been a while since I've reviewed one (perhaps the Michael Moore ones?) and I kind of forget how to do it, to be honest with you. Documentary pictures are odd in that you either take to the subject matter or you don't, meaning you pretty much either love it or hate it. Growing up and still today, my brother was a self professed comic book nerd, so I'd actually heard the name Robert Crumb mentioned a few times (not that my brother read any of Crumb's stuff - strictly superheroes for him). Also, gracing my DVD shelf is a copy of "American Splendor", a biopic starring Paul Giamatti, about the life of Harvey Pekar, who wrote the comic book of the same name, which was sometimes drawn by Crumb. With all that being said, I took to the subject matter and loved what I saw. Not only was it a straight up documentary about one man's rise to fame and his refusal to sell out, but also a portrait of his childhood, what sculpted his eccentric personality and the troubled lives of his two brothers. You don't have to have an interest in comic books to come out of this film with a positive critique. All you have to have is an interest in people and their - what can be sometimes considered weird - behavior.

RATING: 8/10  Okay, so that wasn't really a review, so much as me blabbing for a couple of paragraphs and letting my rating speak for itself. Oh well, you win some, you lose some. We'll get 'em next time!

MOVIES WATCHED: 740
MOVIES LEFT TO WATCH: 261

October 10, 2013  2:16pm

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880. Satantango (1994)

Running Time: 432 minutes
Directed By: Bela Tarr
Written By: Bela Tarr, from novel by Laszlo Krasznahorkai
Main Cast: Mihaly Vig, Putyi Horvath, Laszlo Lugossy, Eva Almassy Albert, Janos Derzsi

GOT LOST ON THE WAY FROM HUNGARY

Let me just start this post off with one word: WOW! No, that's not a good "WOW" either. That's the type of "WOW" you'd use after a long night, after your car broke down, you slipped in mud, spilled wine on your jacket, broke your arm and got chased down by a pack of wild dogs. Just WOW...

I don't even know how to get going here, so I'll just try to dive right into it and hope for the best. As far as the plot synopsis for "Satantango" goes, I don't think I can really give you one, because a lot of the time I didn't know what the hell was going on. The film (yes, it's a film and should, in no way, be referred to as a movie) starts off with a group of people, farm owners, dividing up cash they got, presumably from selling their land. Then they find out that someone (Irimias) they thought was dead, actually isn't and that he's coming back. They get all scared and decide that it would be best to leave town, but they never do...I don't think. Again, there were times when I was really lost. Umm let's see here - after that there was a good two hours where nothing of note seemed to be happening. A drunken doctor stumbling around in the night, trying to buy a bottle of plum brandy and a child torturing a cat, each segment at least one hour in length. Then Irimias talks to the people from the beginning, as well as a few others (I think) and basically gives this great speech which compels them to hand over all their money to him, as he convinces them that there are greener pastures, if only there were more funding. I'll stop this horrid synopsis there and get on with the opinion portion of the post.

This is my 739th movie watched and never have I had a more difficult time with a film - not even close. Not with "Shoah", which had a running time of two hours longer than this, but went a lot smoother and was a lot more interesting (and didn't take me as long). Not with "Henry V", which I despised, nor "Ivan the Terrible", "1900", "Chimes at Midnight" or "The Birth of a Nation". This was the one that actually made me, for just a split second (literally) contemplate throwing in the towel on this whole project. I started this movie on Wednesday night, October 2nd and every night since then, when I had to think about watching a little bit more, I hated life. There were nights when I just couldn't bring myself to watch anymore and I had to take the night off and on night that I did work on it, I couldn't stand it for more than an hour at a time. The dialogue, even when translated to English, was like speech from another world and a lot of times, they'd talk, I'd read and it'd be like a 12-year-old trying to decipher Shakespeare. I don't want to bare my lack of intellect, but I was lost a lot of the time and pretty much had no idea what was going on. The only times when the film actually held my attention long enough to matter, was during the scene where the cat was being tortured and even that was like watching a car crash - horrible, but unable to look away. I mean, that shit was depressing and I was later relieved to hear that a vet a was on set the whole time.

Was the film beautiful? YES! My God, it was one of the best looking films I'd ever seen. Were all the long takes brilliant? Sure, but in my opinion unnecessary. This sometimes came off like a "How To" video on the art of shooting a long take. It seemed as though Tarr just kept throwing them in for the sake of doing so, with no real rhyme or reason to why they were present. Was the length necessary? Absolutely not! Like the long takes, I got the feeling that the length was just in place for the sake of making a long picture. This was mind numbing for me and it really didn't have to be. However, of course I'm going to say that, because I didn't like it. I'm sure there are fans of this film out there saying that it could've gone nine or even ten hours and they'd have been happy. Oy vey, can you imagine? UGH!

This film was definitely an experience for me. There were times, like two nights ago, when I was working on the sixth hour, that I felt guilty for not liking it. It's just such a gorgeous film that it screams masterpiece even when the word "masterpiece" seems out of sight. For a minute, the other night, I kind of started to get reinvested in the film, when I realized that Irimias was basically con jobbing these people and I started to feel like maybe I just didn't pay enough attention or made to much of a big deal out of a few boring scenes, that I wound up making the whole film boring for myself. Then other times, I just wanted it to end so I could come here, give it a '1' and be done with it forever. At this point, I can tell you that a part of me doesn't ever want to see it again, as long as I live and another part wants to someday take another crack at it. Part of me wants to call it the most boring movie ever made, while the other half just wants to stress how beautiful and masterpiece-esque it is. I'm torn and I can tell you that this movie did a number on me. As to what kind of number, I don't know. Unsure of my own feelings toward this picture. I'd compare it to a really beautiful woman who's a massive bitch. You don't really want anything to do with her, but you love to look at her. However, maybe I'm just sugar coating it, because while I was watching it, I hated it. Maybe I'm just trying really hard to be a part of the snooty film club and that's definitely something I don't want to do.

RATING: 4/10  Still trying to sort out my feelings toward the film. Suffice it to say that it's boring as hell, but your eyes will be forever grateful. Comes off like a masterpiece, but the length and too many long takes make it a VERY rough watch. In other news, I'm off until Saturday so I'm really going to try and bang out a few more reviews during my off days. It's a shame that it's the 9th and this is my first movie watched for the month.

MOVIES WATCHED: 739
MOVIES LEFT TO WATCH: 262

October 9, 2013  11:40am

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September 2013 Recap and Other News (Including Final FRIGHTFEST films!)

For the curious, I've been away from the blog for a few days due to a couple of tough work days and the fact that, for the past twenty-four hours, I've been working on "Satantango" - the 7 1/2 hour epic from Bela Tarr. Now then...let's get to it...

1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die - As seen in September 2013
1) Gabbeh (1996 - Mohsen Makhmalbaf) 3/10
2) Back to the Future (1985 - Robert Zemeckis) 7.5/10 - Still a personal favorite of mine, but very willing to admit that there's better stuff out there.
3) Breaking the Waves (1996 - Lars von Trier) 7/10 - Feelings haven't changed much here.
4) Lone Star (1996 - John Sayles) 4/10 - Totally forgettable flick here. Didn't care much for it at all, except for Cooper's performance...and maybe the end.
5) Taxi Driver (1976 - Martin Scorsese) 10/10 - So far, this is the #1 spot of the next TOP 20.
6) Raging Bull (1980 - Martin Scorsese) 10/10 - Decided to jack it up to the full monty. Who am I trying to fool, this is brilliant filmmaking.
7) Mean Streets (1973 - Martin Scorsese) 7/10 - It's grown on me a little bit, for sure. It's not nearly as good as TD or RB, but if you accept that it's a much smaller scale Scorsese piece, then it's really good.
8) The King of Comedy (1983 - Martin Scorsese) 8/10
9) The Usual Suspects (1995 - Bryan Singer) 7/10 - BARELY a '7', but '6.5' seems too low.
10) Shine (1996 - Scott Hicks) 6/10 - Rush's performance is a '10', but the rest of the movie falls flat.
11) Casino (1995 - Martin Scorsese) 5.5/10
12) Goodfellas (1990 - Martin Scorsese) 9/10 - Probably, technically a '10', but it's not as good as TD and RB, so I can't go quite that high. Still great though.
13) Heat (1995 - Michael Mann) 8/10
14) Smoke (1995 - Wayne Wang) 7.5/10 - I had such a good time with this. Keitel's ending monologue is the scene of the film.
15) Clueless (1995 - Amy Heckerling) 4/10 - The 90s nostalgia was nice to re-live, but I was kidding myself when I called this average.
16) Babe (1995 - Chris Noonan) 7.5/10 - Went a LITTLE too high, but still, I'm fully prepared to consider this a guilty pleasure. Loved Cromwell.
17) Three Lives and Only One Death (1996 - Raul Ruiz) 6/10

NON-1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die - As seen in September 2013

Quick words this month, because I have a lot of ground to cover with this recap. Keep scrolling...

1) Stir of Echoes (1999 - David Koepp) 4/10 - My wife and I continuing to go through our massive DVD collection and restructure it. This was just awful this time around and somehow, this is a movie I used to be bat crap crazy for. This is a poor man's "The Sixth Sense", with way worse performances and worse execution. To the "sell" pile.

2) The Machinist (2004 - Brad Anderson) 8.5/10 - Man, if you haven't seen this gem, you are in for a real treat someday when you finally get around to checking it out. Bale proves why he was given the bat suit with a performance that comes complete with a physical transformation. This film is one giant puzzle and will surely have you guessing down to the final scene. Great stuff!

3) Amour (2012 - Michael Haneke) 10/10 - Yep, it's that good and while I haven't seen the other contenders for Best Picture of 2012, I can't imagine any of them being better than this. At times, it's really difficult to watch and one of the saddest flicks I've ever seen, but ultimately it's a masterpiece in movie making as Haneke continues to cement his legacy as one of the greats.

TOP 20 TRACKER
1) Open Your Eyes (20)
2) Happy Together (20)
3) Winchester '73 (10)
4) Back to the Future (20)
5) Breaking the Waves (20)
6) Taxi Driver (20)
7) Raging Bull (20)
8) Mean Streets (10)
9) The King of Comedy (20)
10) The Usual Suspects (10)
11) Goodfellas (20)
12) Heat (20)
13) Smoke (20)
14) Babe (10)

ME vs. TV

My wife and I have been checking out TONS of the new fall shows that have premiered in the past week or so and I decided to share some of my thoughts on what the big three networks came up with for the 2013-2014 season.

1) The Blacklist - Probably the best new show this season and definitely the best drama. Kind of has a Silence of the Lambs feel to it and James Spader is magnificent. This has a long shelf life.

2) Hostages - Loving this too. I hear the ratings aren't that great, but I really don't know why because it's a fine show and the surprises and twists just keep on piling up.

3) Ironside - *MEH* This is just "House, MD", except he's a cop and it's a wheelchair instead of a cane. I'm thinking it probably lasts because so many people LOVE cop shows, but I'm not feeling it. I'll give it another try though. Everything I say is based off of only one episode.

4) Betrayal - Could end up being great, but so far I'd just call it pretty decent. There's tons of potential though and hey, it's got James Cromwell.

5) Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Watched three episodes of this and decided to give up. Andy Samberg annoys me so much, for no reason. I just don't find him funny AT ALL.

6) Dads - This is getting awful reviews and ratings and seemingly on the brink of extinction, but I find it hilarious, as does my wife. I'm loving Giovanni Ribisi here and think that Seth MacFarlane does much better with live action tv, as opposed to live action films.

7) Mom - Liking it enough to stick with it, but the ratings are hideous...or so I've heard.

8) We Are Men - Only saw Episode 1 and it was just okay. I'll check out a few more before I pass final judgment, but I could see this one getting axed.

9) The Goldbergs - I could see this one getting axed too and there are far funnier comedies on this year, but this isn't too bad. I'll stick with it for a while anyway.

10) Trophy Wife - This is hilarious! Really hope this sticks around.

11) The Millers - Only one episode in, but I could see this one doing really well. Arnett is always funny.

12) The Crazy Ones - Only one episode in on this too. Didn't care for the pilot that much, but I'll do a few more before I call it quits. Williams will end up irritating me though, I know it.

13) The Michael J. Fox Show - Pilot wasn't good, but episode two redeemed it. I'll probably continue with this.

FRIGHTFEST 2013

Okay, so the post I made got a lot of attention and I've finally narrowed down the field to seven horror films that WILL comprise this years FRIGHTFEST festivities. Just a reminder, these films will be the first seven, NON-BOOK films to receive formal reviews on the blog. The seven films are....

1) Day of the Dead (1985 - George A. Romero)
2) Dawn of the Dead (2004 - Zack Snyder)
3) The Omen (1976 - Richard Donner)
4) Village of the Damned (1960 - Wolf Rilla)
5) Pumpkinhead (1988 - Stan Winston)
6) The Collector (1965 - William Wyler)
7) To Be Announced

Okay, let's talk about #7 there, which will segue me into a new feature that I plan to do monthly here on the blog. The new feature will be called....

SINS OF OMISSION

"Sins of Omission" will be done once a month here at the 1001 Movies I (Apparently) Must See Before I Die blog and I think it's pretty self-explanatory. It will be a feature highlighting THE BOOK's biggest sins of omission and films that I think should've been included in THE BOOK. Each month, I'll formally review one title and that title will then be placed onto my personal list of the 1000 Greatest Films, which can be viewed by clicking here.

The only rules for the Sins of Omission films is that 1) Can't have been in THE BOOK (obviously) and 2) Can't be on my next list of 1000 films that I plan to watch when I'm done with THE BOOK. That means no "Dial M for Murder", no "Scenes from a Marriage", because they're both on that next list.

This month, the Sin of Omission will also be the conclusion to FRIGHTFEST, the seventh film - yep, that's right, my first sin of omission is a horror movie...sort of.

That's all I'm going to say for now, but not only am I within 300 films of finishing THE BOOK, but I'm also cooking up new things so that this blog can continue. We're getting to that stage where this blog will begin to transform into being a countdown of one man's journey in watching all 1001 films in the 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die book to one man's journey to comprise his own BOOK, his personal collection of 1000 (because 1001 is just an odd number to work with) films that have shaped his cinematic tastes, 1000 favorites.

October 4, 2013  12:38am

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904. Trois vies & une seule mort/Three Lives and Only One Death (1996)

Running Time: 120 minutes
Directed By: Raul Ruiz
Written By: Pascal Bonitzer, Raul Ruiz
Main Cast: Marcello Mastroianni, Anna Galiena, Marisa Paredes, Melvil Poupaud, Chiara Mastroianni

SURREALIST CINEMA

So as I've skipped around, watching movies about talking pigs ("Clueless") and the one with James Cromwell ("Babe"), I've realized that I've actually been putting this one off. I'm not really sure why, but I just had a bad hunch that "Three Lives and Only One Death" would be something that I should dread. Were my suspicions validated?

To detail the plot of TLAOOD, it would take four separate plot synopsis' and since I'm a good, little plot detail man, I'll give you just that. Needless to say, the film is split into four separate pieces, with each piece starring Marcello Mastroianni...

1) The first piece involves Mateo Strano (Mastroianni) bumping into a man at a cigarette stand and offering him 1,000 francs in exchange for one hour of the man's time. Within the one hour, Strano tells the man things that about the man that no one else could know and ultimately tells him that he (Strano) used to be married to the man's wife. He goes on to tell him that he's currently renting an apartment, an odd apartment. One morning, when he awoke from his slumber, he found that he'd been sleeping for twenty years. He blames the heavy rest on fairies, citing that they've taken his time away from him. He then asks the man to return home with him, so that he can show him the apartment. The man returns to his place and Strano then asks him if he'll stay there, while Strano returns home to his wife. When the man refuses, Strano hits him in the head with a hammer and leaves him there. Strano then returns home to a wife that has seemingly been expecting him the whole time.

2) The second piece involves a millionaire named Georges Vickers (Mastroianni), who one day decides that he wants to be a beggar. He gives up teaching at the Sorbonne and takes to placing his hat beside him on a park bench and asking passersby to throw coins into it. Later on, he meets a prostitute and the two become friends, but after a while, Vickers returns to teaching.

3) Next we have a young couple who are madly in love, Cecile and Martin. One day the couple, living in their tiny, cramped apartment, find an envelope in their mailbox with a large sum of money. The envelope arrives every Monday, with the same amount of money. Besides the money, one day when Martin goes to work, Cecile cheats on him with a neighbor. She tells Martin promptly and he forgives her just as promptly. Later, Martin cheats on Cecile, apologizes and is forgiven, as if nothing had happened. Then the money stops arriving and they learn that the man who's been leaving the envelopes has died, but left them in his will. They are willed a mansion, which comes with a butler that they cannot fire, or else they forfeit their inheritance. They name the butler Bell (Mastroianni), for he only comes at the ring of a bell.

4) The final part, sort of ties all the previous parts together and again stars Mastroianni. End of story.

It's worth nothing that there's also a bunch of similarities between the four stories, recurring characters (besides Mastroianni), recurring set pieces (goldfish bowls, snakes, etc.) and other recurring themes (loss of time, changes in social status, love, marriage, infidelity, etc.).

I sincerely just do not know what to say about this one. It was along the lines of something you'd see directed by Luis Bunuel, a piece that peeks your interest, yet leaves you with a "WTF" look on your face and at the forefront of your mind. I was totally turned off when the film started. The story about magic fairies and a man sleeping for twenty years didn't do a thing to entice me and at this point, I didn't know the film would be segmented into fours and I didn't want to sit through two hours of a fairy story. Then that piece ended and the story about the millionaire who wanted to be a beggar started and I dug that. It was a fun little story, perhaps something you'd see in Woody Allen's idea drawer (I've heard he actually has one of those). The third story was the best of all and again, the tiny, decrepit, yet cozy apartment, where the young lovers lived was something you'd find in Woody Allen's world, yet with a surreal twist. I could've watched an entire movie with the characters from episode three. Episode four sort of lost me again and ultimately the whole film left me with that taste you get when you sip a flat Pepsi - you still get some flavor, but ultimately you're left with a cringe.

I don't wanna crap on the film, not at all. I'm fully prepared to take blame for anything I didn't like and say that, perhaps, I was a bit confused by it all. The thing is, is that I didn't hate it by any means, it's just that, perhaps, I expected a little more once the ball got rolling. Episide two surprised me in that it was really good and things got so much better in Act three, that my hopes got a little too high, perhaps. Really, it's one of those films that could go for another look, maybe even three looks to get everything that's thrown at you and fully piece together the puzzle. As it is, call it a definite experience at the movies and something that I won't soon forget, which is always a plus.

RATING: 6.5/10  Not too shabby and definitely had my interest peaked to the max. A bit more explanation, a little more pop and intrigue and this COULD HAVE been gold. As it is, call it just north of *meh*.

MOVIES WATCHED: 738
MOVIES LEFT TO WATCH: 263

September 28, 2013  11:03pm

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886. BABE (1995)

Running Time: 89 minutes
Directed By: Chris Noonan
Written By: George Miller, Chris Noonan, from the novel The Sheep-Pig by Dick King-Smith
Main Cast: James Cromwell, Magda Szubanski, Christine Cavanaugh (voice), Miriam Margolyes (voice), Hugo Weaving (voice)
Click here to view the trailer

"THE 'CITIZEN KANE' OF TALKING PIG MOVIES..."

I realize I said I was going to be moving in reverse chronological order and I'm kind of not, but I reserve the right to be a little wacky with the order in which I move and anyway, I'm moving fairly closely to reverse chronology.

I want everyone who knows me, my writing and my film tastes to stop right now and guess what rating I'll give "Babe". Okay, got it? Now, when you get to the end of the page, lets see if you're right or not, shall we?

The film is probably one of the most wholesome of all the 1001 films contained in the "1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die" book and tells the story of a pig who is separated from his mother at a very young age. Just a runt, the pig (later named Babe, since that's what his mom called him and all of his brothers & sisters) is sent to a carnival and set up in a booth where he can be won if passersby can guess his weight. Enter Mr. Arthur Hoggett (Cromwell), a wise, old farmer who happens to know just a what a pig weighs - with or without a full bladder. Needless to say, Hoggett wins the pig and takes it back to his farm, where the pig meets all of the other farm animals, including a ewe, a duck who wants nothing more than to be a rooster, a narcissistic cat and a couple of sheepdogs, the kings of this jungle. Yes, on Hoggett's farm the sheep dogs are the most respected of all the animals, due to the fact that they work so closely with the master (Hoggett). They're feared by virtually every other animal on the farm, especially the sheep, who refer to them as wolves and think of them as nothing more than murderous carnivores. However, Babe takes to the female sheep dog, Fly and in his loneliest hour, is offered a warm lick from her and the invitation to call her "Mom". After Babe is made an honorary sheep dog, he then wants nothing more than to find his place on Hoggett's farm. The dogs are for rounding sheep, the cat is for keeping Hoggett's wife company and "looking beautiful", the rooster's purpose is to wake, the cow's - to produce milk, the sheep - to produce wool. As far as Babe can tell, his only purpose is to provide the Hoggett's with a feast come Christmastime. However, another calling may soon find it's way to Babe's snout.

Can I just go ahead and go out on a limb here? Okay, I will. With the exception of "Toy Story", this is THE BEST family/kids film in the whole book, hands down! Forget "Willy Wonka", forget "The Lion King", forget "Snow White", forget anything else that is aimed toward children and aimed toward providing wholesome entertainment, "Babe" is the best when it comes to that, I promise you!

I can't even particularly say what it is that I liked so much. Perhaps it was the silent, yet great performance from James Cromwell, which provided the audience with a hard character that softened over time and tugged at our hearts, especially at the end when he gave the pig his nod of approval in the form of a "That'll do pig, that'll do". Perhaps it was the fact that the film reminded me of a great, old children's novel, sitting on a shelf covered in dust and waiting to be read to the next sleepy kid, which was a warm and comfortable reminder. Perhaps it was the fact that this is the only talking animal movie that I haven't been against from the opening credits and because it hooked me and didn't let go. Perhaps it was the fact that it did what every great movie has an obligation to do and that's to make me forget EVERYTHING else for just a couple of hours, laugh when I'm supposed to, cry when I'm supposed to and be left with a racing heart when I'm supposed to. "Babe" will take you on a roller coaster of emotions and while your kids are enjoying the crap out of it, you won't be left in the cold, hoping that it all ends soon so you can get back to adult world.

Trust me folks, I'm just as surprised as you are that I liked "Babe" so much, but what can I say. As I said above, it fulfilled the obligations of a great movie and did it quite well. For about ninety minutes or so this afternoon, as I laid on the bed with my wife, cuddled under blanket and with plenty of pillows nearby, I got to be a kid again and it was a great feeling. This film not only provided me an escape, but it reminded me of so many great things, mostly things that disappeared along with my childhood. And no, this movie was not a movie of my youth, as I was eleven by the time it came out and quite over the whole talking pig thing. I actually didn't see this for quite some time later, but never enjoyed it as much as I did today.

RATING: 8/10  Can't go all the way, but I'm shocked it got that high. Consider this a strong candidate for TOP 20 #8. Man, it's going to be funny to produce a TOP 20 potentially featuring both "Babe" and "Taxi Driver", but it's definitely possible.

MOVIES WATCHED: 737
MOVIES LEFT TO WATCH: 264

September 27, 2013  11:05pm

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894. Clueless (1995)

Running Time: 97 minutes
Directed By: Amy Heckerling
Written By: Amy Heckerling
Main Cast: Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy, Paul Rudd, Dan Hedaya
Click here to view the trailer

AS IF...

I can't believe I'm reviewing this, I can't believe I'm reviewing this, I can't believe.....oh...hello! Yes, the 1995 teen film "Clueless" SOMEHOW gets a nod as one of the 1001 must see movies of all-time and to tell you the truth, I can't believe it.

The film revolves around main character Cher (Silverstone), a typical Beverly Hills teenager, complete with long blonde hair, a rockin' wardrobe, popularity and schoolyard drama. The film is, kind of, told in sectional form, with several running plot lines. When Cher gets a "C" in debate class, she begins to play matchmaker between her debate teacher and another of her teachers. Getting them in love and in a good mood serves well for her grades, which promptly shoot up. Following that, a new student arrives at school, Tai (Murphy), in desperate need of a makeover, which Cher and her best pal Dionne (Dash) take control of. They end up turning Tai into a mini version of Cher and trying to set her up with "Baldwin" (the film's terminology for a cute guy) Elton. However, Elton doesn't want anything to do with Tai and instead wants to date Cher, who isn't interested. Later, Cher falls for Christian, who doesn't seem to be interested. Oh yeah, Paul Rudd's in there too as Cher's ex-step brother, who also seems to have a thing for Cher.

As I was searching for pictures to include in this post, for some reason a picture of Alex DeLarge came up (Malcolm McDowell from "A Clockwork Orange") and it dawned on me even harder what a travesty it was to include "Clueless" in THE BOOK. Now "Clueless" fans, don't get in an uproar just yet, because I do have some nice things to say, I promise, but you have to let me gripe a bit too. If it was the intention of THE BOOK to include a perfect example of a teenage comedy and a representation of 90s culture, then kudos to them, because they succeeded. But you're telling me there wasn't a better example of that? Perhaps there wasn't, I mean the film does give a pretty good example of 90s life in America. You've even got clips of "Beavis and Butt-head" and "Ren and Stimpy" in there, not to mention the music (tunes from The Might Mighty Bostones and No Doubt, two very 90s bands). You've also got the clothes (Paul Rudd rocking flannel, grunge style) and the dialogue all oozing 90s and to be honest, the film kind of took me back to my youth, as I am a child of the 90s. Hell, even Alicia Silverstone, who seemingly lived and died in the 90s (well her public image did anyway) is the star, made famous by the Aerosmith song "Crazy", another 90s tune. The film is 90s through and through!

But still, that doesn't excuse this poor excuse for a must see movie and Heckerling's attempt to recapture previous glory that she had with "Fast Times at Ridgemont High". Hell, there's even a Spicoli in there (Breckin Meyer as Travis)! I won't be too hard on it, because honestly I can understand WHY they included it (the 90s factor), but I can still bitch about it! Honestly though, as much as I didn't take to this movie (I just don't think I'm the core audience), my wife and I did have a pretty good time watching it, giving each other rolled eyes looks and chuckling at the stupid humor.

RATING: 5/10  Slice it right down the middle and call it an average time at the movies. Short one today, because lets face it, "Clueless" doesn't take as long as say "Pi" or "Woman in the Dunes" to write about.

MOVIES WATCHED: 736
MOVIES LEFT TO WATCH: 265

September 27, 2013  12:49pm

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895. SMOKE (1995)

Running Time: 112 minutes
Directed By: Wayne Wang, Paul Auster
Written By: Paul Auster
Main Cast: Harvey Keitel, William Hurt, Stockard Channing, Harold Perrineau, Forest Whitaker
Click here to view the trailer

LOSS AND CIGARS

This is another case of being on an actor kick, this time the actor in question being Harvey Keitel. Since I've just recently watched "Taxi Driver" and more notably for Keitel, "Mean Streets" and since this one was on the horizon, I figured I might as well go for it.

The film is sort of sliced up into five vignettes, each one paying special attention to one of the five main characters. The general plot revolves around a cigar store and it's owner, Augustus "Auggie" Wren (Keitel). He's a simple guy; he runs his store, he chit chats with the customers and he minds his own business. He has several customers that he knows, just through his interactions with them at the cigar store, including Paul Benjamin (Hurt), a novelist. Benjamin is a widow, who's wife died during a street shooting. One day, while walking home from the cigar store, Paul nearly walks into oncoming traffic, only to be pulled back onto the sidewalk by Rashid (Perrineau), a homeless seventeen-year-old with nowhere to go. Since he's just saved Paul's life, Paul feels he owes the boy something and offers him a place to stay for a few nights. Rashid ultimately accepts, but the two clash and Rashid moves out two days later. From there, Rashid goes to find his birth father, whom he hasn't seen in twelve years. Rashid does find his father, Cyrus (Whitaker) working at a garage and strikes up a conversation with him (keeping the fact that he's his son to himself, even lying about his name). Turns out Cyrus owns the garage and offers Rashid a job, which Rashid accepts. There's even a few more plots, one involving an ex-girlfriend of Auggie's (Channing), who returns claiming to have birthed their daughter years prior.

I DID like this, but not as much as I would've liked it, say ten years ago. This is just the type of movie that I used to be a sucker for: real life people, interacting in real life situations. It's something that I would've easily slapped a '10' on back then, but today I'm a little more stingy with my '10' rating and this left me wanting just a hair more. Now, I'm not going to focus on negatives, because honestly the negatives were few and far between. I'd rather focus on the positives; the fantastic cast, the atmosphere and a great script. Can I just say, before we move on that I LOVED Paul's (William Hurt) apartment in this. It was one of those Woody Allen-esque apartments, the kind of an apartment essential to a writer, with a dividing slide door, separating Paul's writing area from the rest of his place. Those great big windows out front, good for watching the streets and drumming up inspiration and even that small window above the kitchen sink, good for watching the rain pour over on a dreary day. Great set location!

Anyway, enough about that. Keitel was really great here and I realize I said in my "Mean Streets" review that he didn't make a good leading man, but I have absolutely no bones to pick with Keitel, as he almost always turns in a noteworthy performance and "Smoke" is no exception. You've also got one of my faves in William Hurt, the fantastic Forest Whitaker and Harold Perrineau, who some of you may know from HBO's Oz (as Augustus Hill, the one in the wheelchair. Oddly enough, Keitel's name in "Smoke" is also Augustus). You've also got Stockard Channing and a quick appearance from Ashley Judd (who also showed up in "Heat", my previously viewed movie).

Look, this is just a really easy to watch movie that I think a lot of you are going to love if you give it a shot. It's not one many of us have heard of, I don't think, so it's also got that hole in the wall factor, the kind of film that you can spring on people and make them think you uncovered this rarely seen, little gem. Keep your eyes and ears peeled for Harvey Keitel's big, at least ten minute monologue at the end, entitled Auggie Wren's Christmas Story, which is just a beautifully written piece. Whenever you can set a camera in front of someone and just let them go and they have the chops to pull it off, you know you've got talent on your hands and that's Keitel for ya.

RATING: 7.5/10  No real, prevalent flaws to speak of, just a really good picture. It's not top notch stellar or anything, but it's certainly worth your time.

MOVIES WATCHED: 735
MOVIES LEFT TO WATCH: 266

September 26, 2013  1:39am

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